Monday, March 11, 2013

Why am I doing this?!

So this weekend was the first nice weekend in a very long time.  I needed to get a long run in so I used Sunday for it.  Even though for the first time in a long time I didn't get out of bed until 8a.m, I got ready and went to the park for my first long run before the Pittsburgh Half. My sister was supposed to meet up with me to run a little so I sent her text before I left saying that I would be at the park and to not call until she got there because I would be running.  When she finally got there I had already ran my 7 miles and walked a mile and a half cool down lap.  She's so fantastic that she brought be coffee! I love coffee. 

Once we finished our coffee and she had her bagel, we walked around for a slow two miles.  As we were talking, she asked what brought up all this exercise and why I was so into running a half marathons now. She said it was very admirable but she just wanted to know what conspired all of my ideas.  I told her that there were a lot of things and I could just pinpoint one reason. I kind of held onto her question for the rest of the day and I really started to think about it.  Why the hell would I want to run and work out as much as I do? Currently, I work two jobs, sometimes I work for almost an entire month without a day off but I still find time to run and work out.  As I took the rest of the day to think about it, I came up many reasons. [ Most were my top-of-my-head answers to my sister when she asked] I'm going to share these with you.

1.) As a child I got made fun of so bad for being heavy and over weight that I went home crying almost everyday and when my mom would try to call the school, nothing would get done.  Though I'm only 23 and haven't lived very long,but I don't remember a time when i was so miserable than when I was in the third to seventh grade. I'm not going to lie, seeing the girls that used to make fun of me for being "fat", "ugly", and "over weight", that are now twice my size makes me so happy. It's so mean and cruel but I get a secret excitement when I see them out. They made me ABSOLUTELY miserable.
2.) 4 years ago, I couldn't run a mile without stopping.  I went running with a really good friend after work one day and we were only going to go a mile.  Pretty much every few feet I kept asking if we were there yet.  It was pretty embarrassing but a few days later we found out that  I had asthma and I never want to feel like that again. 
3.) It's supposed to make your asthma better. So, have you seen the commercial where the girl is talking to the guy and she tells him that they can't post anything on the internet that isn't real? And her new boyfriend walks over that looks kind of mediocre and she says she met him on the internet and he's a french model? Yeah, that's me. I believe a lot of things that I see online.  Not everything, but positive motives towards health I do. If someone tells me that running will help my asthma, then I'm running. Now, I'm on a lot of medicine and it's going to be a very long time before I'm off all of it but if it helps me to breath, then I'll do whatever I can. 
4.) One day my sister and I were running together and she said that she thought it would be cool to finish a marathon or half marathon.  At this point in my life, I'm not getting younger. I'm not old either. But, if I don't do this now, when will I? I can't keep saying I'm going to do it.
5.) Though, my gramma was my best friend, I don't want to be like her. My gram had a lot of health problems.  So did the rest of my family.  We were a lot alike too.  I worry like her, we always had the same opinions on things. I love her but I don't want to go through what she went through in her last 5 years.  
6.) There are so many health problems that run in my family and I don't want that to happen to me. When I went to the pulmonary doctor for the first time, they send you a packet to fill out of health issues with your families heart and lungs. Yeah well, I ran out of room writing things down just for my immediate family. Isn't that awful? Almost every person in my family has something wrong with either their heart or lungs. 
7.) I could never understand how those people could run for so long without stopping. I wanted to be one of those people.  I envied them. I I would run a little while and huff and puff a walk. Now they are leaving before I'm finished running.  It makes me happy to know that I am one of "those people".
8.) I feel better about myself. Most people will tell you this.  Working out sucks.  Once you're finished or starting to lose weight, you'll start to feel so much better and energized.  It will help with stress too. 

So, those are most of the reasons I have as to "what brought up my exercise addiction". I'm sure I can't find more, but those are the first things I think of when someone asks, what brought this up. I wasn't always athletic.  I was in a lot of sports and I kind of looked athletic but I wasn't athletic. At all. I'm finally happy with my body and proud of how far I have come and will go. 
Your turn! 
What brought up your "reason to run or workout"? 
How do you feel now?

No comments:

Post a Comment